How to recommit to your mission after a setback (video)

by Nadine Nicholson on February 10, 2013

in Mindset, Personal Stories, Strategy + Goals

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Fabulous things happen every week for you, I just know it.

And, there are things that happen that aren’t so fabulous. You might even call these setbacks.

Ever had a setback in your business or life rock your world and feel like it actually “set you back”?

Experiences like this can be rough, there’s no question about it. And, here’s the truth.

These experiences can profoundly propel you forward – if you allow yourself to be still, be grateful and channel your energy forward.

Recently, a business colleague of mine died very suddenly. It rocked my own world 100 times over.

At first it set me back. I retreated. And, I needed to retreat to move forward.

While his death is a sad thing to share, I know for certain he’d want me to teach what I’m about to teach you. That’s the kind of person he was.

I’m going to show you three steps to move through setbacks – no matter how big or small – and recommit to your mission in a bigger, bolder way than ever before.

First, let me tell you about Brian.

Recently, I committed to a year-long, utterly fabulous business development program with Lisa Cherney.

I’m one of eight members of her Inner Circle – there are seven women and one man.

On a Friday afternoon in January, we had a group call to share our achievements and commit to our next action steps.

Brian, the man in the group, was not on that call. This was strange to all of us because he always made the calls.

Brian died that day in Kauai, Hawaii. He and four friends were exploring a rocky area and a rogue wave swept up and took Brian to sea. Then, his best friend Adam was taken too. It was heartbreaking.

Brian was an incredibly vivacious and visionary human being. He was one of the best examples I’ve ever seen of someone LIVING his life.

Using my own experience of Brian’s passing, I’m going to show you how you can recommit to your own mission after any setback in your own life and business.

Learn more about this article in this short video:

And, here’s the rest of the article in written form:

Use these 3 steps to move through a setback and recommit to your mission:

1. Be still and reflect.

When a setback happens, it’s easy to brush it off and pretend nothing happened by jumping into your work and keeping busy. However, by doing that, you don’t allow yourself to learn from it and be at peace with it.

Let’s face it. Setbacks happen all the time. Maybe a dream client said no. Maybe a program launch had a glitch and you lost sales. Maybe a relative got sick. Maybe a business colleague died in a matter of seconds, like Brian did.

With Brian’s death, I went through some distinct emotions. At first I was in shock and disbelief. Then,
I felt deep sadness. Next, I felt really ticked off that he was gone – that I wouldn’t get a chance to learn from him or help him grow his business. And lastly, I celebrated him, turned his death to a sacred blessing for the shortness of life and recommitted to my own mission.

For your own setback, the emotions you go through may be similar or completely different. You need to allow yourself time to be still and reflect on how the setback is impacting you. Let yourself be with it – without brushing it off or starting something new just to feel busy and avoid it.

2. Show gratitude.

One way to feel at peace with and move forward from a setback is to reflect on what inspired you, what you learned from it and what you’re grateful for. Every setback has a lesson for you. Each one can make you stronger, if you let it. For Brian, I participated in a memorial service with others from our business development program and shared my gratitude for him.

Answer these questions related to your experience of your own setback:

  • What inspired you?
  • What did you learn?
  • What are you grateful for?

3. Recommit to your mission.

Once you’ve answered these three questions, you’ll likely feel more at peace with the setback. Now you’re ready to take the next step – recommit to your mission – with more fortitude and inner knowing than ever. During Brian’s memorial service, we all voiced what we committed to doing – and being – in his name.

Just like you, there’s a reason I was born at this particular time in history. I am grateful to be able to live that purpose every day and that being said, leadership in the entrepreneurial world is a big responsibility and many days I feel fear of putting myself out there.

My commitment was to look at Brian’s picture anytime I feel fear while building my business. To me, his picture symbolizes courage, strength and living life large.

What is your own mission? And, based on what you learned, what can you commit to doing – or being – to recommit to your own mission? It can be as simple as looking at the picture of someone who inspires you and gives you courage. Maybe you write a journal entry about what come from the experience. Or maybe you phone a current client just to reach out and say you’re thinking of her.

A friend said Brian died in the sea for others to see.

Here’s what I know for sure that Brian would want for you.

He’d want you to grab hold of your life and live it.

He’d want you to move through setbacks, learn from them and recommit to your life’s work, every time.

And, he’d definitely want you to not waste a single second of what you have.

It’s Your Turn

Think of a setback in your life or business from the last week. Take 15 minutes to move through the 3 steps and write a comment below with ONE thing you learned from the experience. Be specific. Or, if you’d prefer, share ONE thing you do to move through setbacks in your own life.

P.S. Get clarity on what’s next in your business with a complimentary strategy call with me. You’ll walk away knowing your exact next step to LEAP your business forward.

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Gina Bell February 11, 2013 at 8:46 am

This is such a beautiful article Nadine. The 3 steps you’ve outlined here are powerful and necessary. Step #2 in particular – showing gratitude – reminds me of the saying … you can have reasons or excuses – not both. A setback can become an excuse or it can be a reason to recommit to your mission if you’re willing to see the good that is still there. Loving the reminder. Thank you! xo

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2 Nadine Nicholson February 20, 2013 at 3:58 pm

Hi Gina, thanks so much. Personally I know I’m grateful for gratitude. I know you are too. Thanks for popping in, I always love seeing you here.

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3 http://google.com February 13, 2013 at 4:30 am

I personally contemplate as to why you branded this specific
article, “How to recommit to your mission after a setback
(video)”. In any event I really adored it!Thank you-Lamont

Reply

4 Charlotte February 13, 2013 at 11:58 am

Nadine, I have to commend you on taking an emotional trial and turning it into a positive! I have recently had a set-back myself and I can not tell you how important # 1 is! Taking the time to just “chill-out” and feel what you need to feel is only to begin to move forward again.

Showing gratitude really helps to regroup. Pull together the emotions with next steps. And then recommitting is so important but can’t happen unless #1 and #2 are complete. I think that is how we often get stuck. Great job on lying out these steps!

I’m so sorry for your loss but remembering that life is short and we have to live it now is so powerful! Thank you for sharing your experience with this. You are a strong women Nadine! :)

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5 Nadine Nicholson February 20, 2013 at 4:01 pm

Charlotte, I hope this article helped you with your own personal trial and of course will help you in the future. Thanks for being here. ~ n

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6 Lisa Montanaro February 15, 2013 at 11:32 am

Nadine – So sorry about Brian… so sad. I remember the original post you wrote about his passing. And I appreciate how much you have shared about the impact his death has had on you personally and professionally. Your advice here is heartfelt and useful. It is so important to regroup. Your three points above about taking time to reflect, show gratitude and recommit are wonderful.

I have had a few setbacks over the years, including losing people close to me, and relocating for my husband’s job, but you soldier on after taking the time to regroup. It helps us grow, and I think makes us more empathetic too in the long run to what others are going through. I think it makes us a better person and entrepreneur because we then have that breadth and depth of understanding that only comes from experiencing a set back and then overcoming it.

Thanks for opening yourself up to us… – Lisa

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7 Nadine Nicholson February 20, 2013 at 4:01 pm

Lisa, you’re most welcome. Thank you for being here and sharing yourself too. ~ n

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8 Lynn Spiro February 16, 2013 at 10:08 pm

Nadine, thank you for sharing a powerful, yet very personal message. I just experienced something of the same thing in January. Taking some time off to spend on vacation was supposed to give me some reflective time and planning time, but family issues arose as well as a death in the family and that went out by the wayside. It blindsided me and I found it difficult to rebound from.

After reading your posting, I took some time to digest things, regroup and recommit to what I was working on. It helped.

So, again, thank you.

Lynn

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9 Nadine Nicholson February 20, 2013 at 4:02 pm

Lynn, your comment is a good reminder that life happens and sometimes we need to “be with” what we need to be with and that’s exactly the right thing at the time. Thanks Lynn for your comment. ~ n

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10 Margo DeGange, M.Ed. February 21, 2013 at 10:16 am

Nadine, I sure can relate to this post and video.

After losing my mom and then my brother not long after, and caring for a Dad who was messed up from it all, my life was shaken. I did a LOT of reflecting after being numb for a while.

At first I was so focused on others that I missed what I needed. Then I saw my needs and that I was not allowing myself to take care of them (everyone else needed me, or thought they did). I did go off course for a while, then after reflection I began to change up my routine a bit. I added some activity that was just for my wellness. I also added some creative outlets–doing artsy things that were new and exciting. It made a big difference. Then I could see more clearly to get back to my mission. In fact, the activity I added was in line with my mission for a certain kind of life and a certain mindset as I live it.

Then again very recently I lost a dear, dear friend. It was sad, and surprising. My reaction this time was to use her passing as an immediate reminder–just as you mentioned–that life is short and that I must stay on course and committed to my mission. So, after her funeral, It was so natural (and felt so positive) to place her memorial card with her picture on it right in my work space, next to my laptop as inspiration! I decided (proclaimed) that she was from now on my guardian angel. Her sweet face reminds me of how important my work of helping others really is.

Thanks for sharing this beautiful message Nadine.

Margo

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11 Nadine Nicholson March 24, 2013 at 9:01 pm

Margo, big hugs! The last year has been quite a year for you. Your positive, uplifting soul brings light to all those around you – including YOU! Thanks for sharing your story, Margo. ~ n xo

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